stress, stress and more stress!

Its been so hectic here that I've hardly found time to breath let alone clean or sleep. We are going to classes 5 days a week now and are doing another one online. We've got papers due everyday and we are going to different places every day. To top off the month, I'm a week late for my monthly gift and after chewing off all my nails in anticipation( we are using a book to choose the gender thing) of possibly being pregnant, I was left with a negative in the window. Ive taken about 3 and still have not started my period and I'm usually on time , Ive never been this late ever.... so I went to the clinic and I should find out tomorrow what the blood tests says, I'm posting this on here because I have chosen to keep this matter private from family and I know they never read this lol. Any suggestions on what it could be causing this miss? I am thinking it could be stress, but Ive had stress now for a while so I'm ruling that out, next up would be cervical cancer, since Ive had a leap in the past and failed to keep up with annuals once I got into the program. Just too much going on right now and no answers to anything ... its killing me.

letting loose!

On our last day at clinicals this quarter we were told that we should take some pictures, after getting all the dressing changes, and other stuff done we needed to we had 5 minutes left. So we decided to take a few pics of just our group having fun. We have bonded so much throughout this quarter and the entire class that I will almost be sad its gonna be over in June. I truly will miss these women I got to know and love.

Almost done with school!

It's almost time for our capping ceramony in April. I've come a long way from day 1 as far as nursing goes. I've grown so much and learned so much about nursing so far. I'm documenting this so that I can reflect back years from now when I'm tired and beat down and want to quit , that at some point I really did like this career. I will graduate in June but I cant call myself a nurse until I officially pass the nclex. I'm so thankful to my boys who are putting up with my late night studying and not playing with them that much. For giving up game night and sports so I can finish school. My husband too for helping me with the chores around the house when I dont have time to get to them because I'm still up writing my papers that are due at 630 am. Its been a painful road but its almost over .

My sister is getting married!

I've been meaning to post this for some time now, sorry its late news but I found out the day I came back down to Georgia that My sister's boyfriend of 2 years purposed to her on the night before I left, he said he was going to wait for christmas dinner but he wanted her to be able to share the news with me in person so he did it early. Isn't that sweet of him. Anyway I am so happy for her, Zack is a wonderful guy for her, and he is great with kids already so he will make a good dad when the time comes. The are planning to get married in Celina, OH on July 9th of 2011. I've been asked to help out with making some stuff wich I love to do. And be in the wedding as a bridesmaid. The helping I'm totally down with , but I might have to pass on the bridesmaid part. I'm not sure I'm cut out for dresses in this body... lol. Anyway I'm so happy for them and I'm completely looking forward to helping them with whatever they need me too. Just wanted to share the news.

Chaos reigns in the house....

Maybe its just me but I don't remember ever being this rowdy. On any typical given day there will an average of 3 fights, crying and hitting by all, some times its come to injuries others just hurt feelings. I've tried to settle them down and judge these fights fairly but there is never a straight story to be heard. I'll give you an example of this.... "mom! Tonio just punched me in the face for no reason!(crying and screaming as if he were dying) " what happened? Tonio: he said I was an idiot and told me I sucked at playing the game. Mom: Devin did you say that him? Devin: NO! I was just minding my own business in there and he just started punching me in the arm like this ( showing me how). Mom: I thought you said he punched you in the face? Devin: He did, he he he just didn't do it first. Mom: So you sat there and let your brother punch you in the face? Devin: yeah, cause you always tell me to not fight back. just to come tell you. Mom: I do but I don't want to just stand there and get beat up, you could have ran away or came to me faster. couldn't you? Tonio: Devin just wont leave me alone, I never get any peace in this house. Devin: you started it tonio! Mom: Boys can we just quit the fighting for once? I know you guys don't get along great but that's no need to try and beat each other up. Devin: see! you always take his side! no one ever believes me... (storms off to his room)
Ugh, is there ever an end to this pattern, I need to hire a professional referee for them I think. and Don't leave out the 5 year old, he is the main instigator in most of the fights. Thank goodness I've got school to keep me sane lol.

Christmas is over .... New years resolutions up....

Okay, so at last Christmas is over. As usual we had hardly no presents to give out... but we did our best. The boys had a nice time visiting with grandma up in Ohio but as we were only there 4 short days we didn't see to many people, just mom, dad , crystal and Zack and my grandmother. We were supposed to get to see Madeline at the Christmas family party, but as usual my brother decided not to come down, that we should come up to Findlay which is 2 hours away.. as if we didn't drive far enough to see them.... I went along with the plan up until the day prior and then after talking with my sister and dad we decided we weren't going to go up. I think its very rude of him do not bring Maddie down to my mom's house just because they think the pets might go nuts and hurt Maddie. although they won't say why they never come visit mom at her house with Maddie. While I would like to see my niece , I am in no way going to put up with her parents behavior towards my family. I say my because I have disowned my brother a long time ago. lol I'm sorry I didn't get a chance to visit you all, I would have liked to see you all and your new babies. I am planning to come up in the summer if I get a chance to but if not we will be moving that summer so who knows when I will be up again. Me personally, I'm ready for a new place. Now as for new years resolutions, the main one is to finish my degree. followed closely by lose 140lbs. I'm guessing the first will be easier for me.lol Here is a shot of the boys at Milton park sledding my favorite shot.

As the term ended for my 2nd quarter of nursing school , we lost 2 more women.. one of them was a really good friend of mine from program. It's a rough year already but to loose the one you look to for reassurance that you are gonna get through was a hard blow. I find myself second guessing if this is really a job I can do. After all this wasnt my first choice like so many of my classmates. I'm going to tough it out until I fail out or pass. but getting ready to enter into the final half of my degree program with a sour attitude and one less friend and study partner sure is painful. On a brighter note, im just a few steps away from finishing up my big projects for christmas this year. The boys had their christmas concert which I always enjoy , but hate going to because there is no where to sit, so we have to stand for about 3 hours.