Christmas is over .... New years resolutions up....

Okay, so at last Christmas is over. As usual we had hardly no presents to give out... but we did our best. The boys had a nice time visiting with grandma up in Ohio but as we were only there 4 short days we didn't see to many people, just mom, dad , crystal and Zack and my grandmother. We were supposed to get to see Madeline at the Christmas family party, but as usual my brother decided not to come down, that we should come up to Findlay which is 2 hours away.. as if we didn't drive far enough to see them.... I went along with the plan up until the day prior and then after talking with my sister and dad we decided we weren't going to go up. I think its very rude of him do not bring Maddie down to my mom's house just because they think the pets might go nuts and hurt Maddie. although they won't say why they never come visit mom at her house with Maddie. While I would like to see my niece , I am in no way going to put up with her parents behavior towards my family. I say my because I have disowned my brother a long time ago. lol I'm sorry I didn't get a chance to visit you all, I would have liked to see you all and your new babies. I am planning to come up in the summer if I get a chance to but if not we will be moving that summer so who knows when I will be up again. Me personally, I'm ready for a new place. Now as for new years resolutions, the main one is to finish my degree. followed closely by lose 140lbs. I'm guessing the first will be easier for me.lol Here is a shot of the boys at Milton park sledding my favorite shot.

As the term ended for my 2nd quarter of nursing school , we lost 2 more women.. one of them was a really good friend of mine from program. It's a rough year already but to loose the one you look to for reassurance that you are gonna get through was a hard blow. I find myself second guessing if this is really a job I can do. After all this wasnt my first choice like so many of my classmates. I'm going to tough it out until I fail out or pass. but getting ready to enter into the final half of my degree program with a sour attitude and one less friend and study partner sure is painful. On a brighter note, im just a few steps away from finishing up my big projects for christmas this year. The boys had their christmas concert which I always enjoy , but hate going to because there is no where to sit, so we have to stand for about 3 hours.

The big 5 !

My youngest boy turned 5 on November 10th and it seems like just yesterday he was just arriving home from the hospital. I love how they've all grown into their own unique personalities. While Wyatt takes alot after his older brother Devin, they have their differences still. This year we left behind the Cars movie for Transformers, he wanted a brownie cake (which has become quite popular in our house). With all my kids now off to school this next year and me starting my career as a nurse shortly I am feeling a little nostalgic of when they were all so tiny. While big boys can help out alot, its harder to make them want to. lol We are planning a trip up to Ohio in December from the 19th thru 24th and I hope to be able to stop by and visit with all of you up there.

Devin turns 9!

Devin is my middle child, he loves his music, especially Micheal Jackson. Just recently he has taken an intrest in playing football. We got him a football for his birthday and he's been putting us to work playing pass and running plays with the neighbor kids outside. Its really hard for me to find any time to be with my boys but I'm doing my best to keep up with their interests and hobbies and still maintain a B average in class. All in all , Devin has come a long way in the past 2 years. He is the sweetest boy when he wants to be, he always knows how to make me laugh.

A Birthday to remember

My birthday this year fell on what was probably one of the worst days Ive had in a long time. It was our first day at our clinical site in our second quarter. We were going to a real hospital this time, no nursing home. As the day progressed I just became more and more overwhelmed by the medical language. It was like people were speaking a foreign language all of a sudden. In short , the whole charting our work in medical jargon was killing me, I could do the job but would completely blow the paperwork. I started to second guess whether or not I could do this as a career. After all if I was lost and confused on day one , it would only get worse. I left the hospital the first day in tears, thinking this might have to be my last day. But then a ray of hope shown thru, my mom had sent me a birthday card that day and she called me that evening and we talked about how things were going, she calmed my fears and made me smile, just what moms are supposed to do. Later that night I read my birthday card, it was signed "from Mom and dad, with Love and pride." I thought to myself, wow someone is really actually proud of me? That is the first time I have ever heard that word I think used. I was so happy that someone actually believed in me that I dug down and found the confidence I needed to continue on in class. I still get a bit queasy heading up to the hospital knowing that I'm going to be meeting a complete stranger to take care of, but its getting better.

Movie under the stars

Okay remember the times when you would get into the car with blankets and pillows and candy and head to the drive in? I loved going as a kid and on post here they started a new tradition of having a huge screen set up in a field and serving free popcorn and letting us sit on the grass. Well they were playing Night at the Museum 2 which I hadn't seen yet so I was thinking its free and the kids would love it. So we loaded them up and drove out to the field, and I say we because my husband actually made it this time too. The movie was great, but I should have brought bug spray lol. The middle child was enjoying it, watched the whole show. The oldest was complaining that he wanted to go back to the car and sleep since he takes his medicine at 630pm and it was already 9pm I don't know how he stayed awake to be honest. And Wyatt my baby, was just bored.... go figure... I take him to a field where he could run around and go nuts and hes bored.... lol All in all I enjoyed the show and I think we will have another attempt at it on the 9th of October. It brings back memories watching a huge screen in the middle of nowhere .... I guess my kids are definitely from the technology generation cause they were like completely bored with the idea of it and kept saying we could have gone to the theatre for a movie lol.

Happy Birthday Mom

Today is my mom's birthday, I just wanted to take a little bit of my short free time to say thankyou to her for raising me the best way she could, in alot of ways looking back I dont see how she did some of the things she managed. lol even I am envious. She always found a way to let us enjoy our sports and play with our friends. She gave me the room I needed when I was going thru a tough time and helps me out when I'm in trouble, even today. I wouldnt trade my mom for anyone else. Thankyou mom and enjoy your birthday!

Reflecting back on my expierences

Well our time at our first clinical is almost over, we have one day left. And while I'm not going to miss it, I gained a vast amount of knowledge from my short time there. I got to see a rare glimpse into the other side of nursing homes. I saw a perspective of how it feels to be a patient who cant do anything for themselves and how much that has to effect a person who once was the sole provider of their family. I've seen tears, and Ive seen laughter, but the ones that get you the most are the ones that are locked up inside their own bodies. I know now why my grandmother is so afraid of going into a nursing home, its not so much the care, but its the fear of not being able to do anything for herself, from feeding to bathing, picking out your clothes, even going to the bathroom. Its a scary thing for me to think about it too. At the same time , I was able to help so many of them just to see a new face, a new person to talk with sometimes to sing with, sometimes to hold on to. So as I leave my first experience as a student behind I am looking forward to the next challenge next quarter.

Time to play with the seniors!

Okay so after a grueling 40 minutes of practice on my one missed checkoff technique, I passed! And since I only missed one I got to finish and go with the people who didn't miss any to the clinical site today! We had to be in uniform and we looked so cool, just like you see on TV when the student doctors are following around the head nurse lol. Anyway so I'm in the A/B group for clinicals and the C group will join up with us tomorrow. The D/F group doesn't get to go to clinicals this term but hopefully they will join us next week. And with all the excitement my trusty car decided to break again lol. I have no clue what it is this time but I hope its not expensive. And on top of everything I am coming down with a cold today.... lol that's life for you. I'm trying to work into my already busy schedule , dental apts for the boys and me and reading time for devin and wyatt as well as something to do with tonio. but its not going to be easy. Plus I'm almost done with the task I was given by God. I'm so excited I did it even though it took me a long time and hundreds of man hours, I know it was worth it.

If only I had a magic wand and a suitcase full of cash...

So its been a busy 2 weeks here in Georgia, after debating hard over what to do about going to Lisa's wedding in Indiana, and braking the bank to do it (literaly) I also had clinical checkoffs that following monday, those were very nervewracking, ( basically have to preform the procedures in front of an instructor in a timed enviroment ) there were 5 in all , I passed the first one but failed the next, but I was able to pull it back together to finish off the next 3 and only fail 1 out of 5. It hurt so badly to miss her wedding, because out of all of my friends she was the only 1 at my wedding literaly. ( I'm not perticarly fond of how low budget it was) So I checked all avenues to see if I could make it work, I looked into flying on a buddy pass, but when I found out I would have to take all the boys that idea flew out the window. Next I thought of driving up but then money came into play and I was really worried about not having enough money to put in car to get up there , ideas of being stranded 400 miles from anyone kinda scared me . When I finally came to the decision that I couldnt go I decided to use what little money I did have to get her a gift. The only comforting thought I had was that we dont really talk or see each other anymore and I doubted that she would even mind if I didnt go. Besides she had her two best friends from high school there for her who would cover for those of us who couldnt come. This eased my mind alot about not making it be it true or not. In the end , I've not been to any of my friends weddings, nor have I ever been in a wedding lol so I guess im just not cut out to be wedding material. As for nursing, I just am getting started but I hope I can be a better nurse than friend.

Our LPN uniforms are finally here

Well we have reached the halfway point in the first quarter and we have already lost 3 students. Those of us that are left are gearing up for our procedure checkoffs in 2 weeks. Those include, inserting a feeding tube, wound bandaging, inserting a foley catheter, and giving an enema. fun fun ...lol. I got my first 100 finally and I was so happy! It was so much fun seeing everyone get their uniforms and try them on. Kinda makes things seem for official and puts our goals in sight. Thought you all would get a kick out of my uniform pic. Hopefully all this nursing will cut down on my fluffyness lol

long time, no see...

Just wanted to let you all know I haven't died yet lol, I've been so busy doing essays, volunteer time, practicing my procedures in lab that I've hardly touched my blogs or websites. On the positive side of that I am doing well in there. Antonio started 5th grade today! and he is now saying he wants to try out for tackle football and karate. Devin started 3rd grade today. He looked focused when i went by his classroom to see if he made it to school ok. And Wyatt started pre-K today so now they are all in school, sorta lol. They are all doing fine, except for Wyatt who is still whining that he had to get 3 shots yesterday.... ( I'm not one to baby my kids) lol I've tried countless avenues to figure out how to come up to Indiana for a friends wedding but after the facts come in, i.e. no cash, no babysitter, and class on Friday and Monday I don't think I'm gonna make it up. Its been bothering me that I cant make it alot, so those of you that are going please let her know , I have made every effort to come and you guys better send me lots of pics!!

Nursing classes

well its been about 5 days into the LPN program that I competed for , I was so shocked to hear that there would only be 28 of us starting the program instead of the 40 they had slotted, then she told us how many people were interviewed for the spots and I cant honestly believe my luck of getting in, they interviewed 130 people for the program. So far its been very interesting and fun, lots of tests and info to memorize but Ive always been fascinated by how the body works and helping people out so I am kinda excited to start our clinicals in the end of august ( clinicals are actually working at the hospital with patients with supervision of course) We had to spend a ridiculous amount of cash on uniforms and equipment and that's not including books, all together I have spent about 900.00$ on stuff for the program... while I have military scholarships that paid for my books , they are only reimbursing me for my uniforms and that still leaves me to pay for the rest which is about 200$. In the long run it will definitely be worth it so I'm super happy that I didn't get into the sonography program earlier since I would have missed out on being with my mom during her surgery and staying up there for her . I think God was looking out for me in my best interest . I'm going to make a great OB or neonatal nurse some day!

Baseball season is over

While it got off to a rocky start for Tonio, team sports are tough on him, the teams did pretty well over all . Antonio played for the Rangers ages 9-11 this year which is now pitched by the team instead of the coach. they had a pretty good season with 3 wins i believe and 5 loses. Devin played for the Red Hawks in the 5-8 yr old so he was top dog for his team. Devin tried diligently to get that ball to the fence this year since I made him a bet that if he hit the fence i would give him 100$. ( Secretly hoping that was impossible) He managed to almost do it this year! He made about 6 home runs this year. Tonio had a tough time with the fast pitching and struck out alot. But near the end of the season he did manage to hit 3 balls into the outfield. I was so proud of him! Chon managed to come to a whopping 2 games this year.... due to Drill SGT work. I hope that playing baseball gives the boys the skills to see what it is like to work as a team and for a team if nothing else.

Summer visit from Grandma

Since the base always celebrates independence day early here My parents and my grandmother decided to drive down and spend the week with us. We had a great time, I took them all to see the new Infantry Museum , and we cooked out on the newly made deck ( my mom paid for) she is so nice! We even had our first guest ( note the small caterpillar in the picture with Wyatt) The fireworks were great this year, I didn't get to spend much time with my husband at the park since he was tasked with watching the privates there but then again , I'm used to that. comes with the job. We've been spending tons of time at the pool this year but all that is about to end with my classes starting just around the corner. I've been so busy getting ready for it that Ive had no time to post for a while so sorry for the absence.

Old fashion lemonade stand

Today the boys decided to start earning cash for the summer by opening up a lemonade and Kool-aid stand, Devin, Tonio , and their friend Jesse handed out the goods and kept the cash while Wyatt reeled the customers in with his cuteness ( or was it the ninja costume) holding the sign they made up . At any rate they amazingly made about 20$ in an hour, is that insane or what? LOL just goes to show you that kids are cute! lol enough to tip for a cup of lemonade.

Sisterhood

I wanted to share with you all that yesterday was my sister's 25th birthday. I can still remember when Mom brought her home from the hospital, all I wanted to do at the age of 7 was play mommy to her. lol As she grew we became best friends, I took her shopping and to movies with me all the time. After high school, she decided to go to cosmetology school to become a beautician. She came a long way from wanting to be a waitress when she was 13. lol She now works over in Troy at Glamour nail &hair gallery. She is a wonderful stylist, I get my hair done every time I'm up to see the family. She is such a sweet person, and very kind. I am so glad her and I had the chance to grow up together as sisters. So here's to you sis, enjoy your birthday !

Free Swimming!

It's officially summer here now in Georgia with temperatures in the 90's. So we were going to get the boys swimming passes to the pool on post this year but turns out for some unknown reason all the pools are FREE this year! Talk about good luck. The boys found a new favorite one to hit up its got a low diving board and a rock climbing wall . Wyatt would like it better if he could touch the bottom however, it starts at 4ft. so I bought him a float ring and he will get in with me. I can't wait to get rid of these pasty white legs anyway!

school is out and it's time for summer

School ended on Wednesday here and kids are already cramming in as much playtime as possible and for me that means tons of added work. Since Chon's back to being a Drill Sgt. and they just picked up their new batch of troops I wont be seeing from him for about a week or two. This means its just me to get everything done. There are some good things that are coming out of this summer though, Mom is allowed to come down and visit us, and they made the outdoor swimming pool on post FREE this year so I am taking the kids every weekend to go swimming since I wont have class on Saturdays. Wyatt is enjoying his summer days playing as well as school. While summer has gotten off to a rocky start with me hitting a piece of metal on the road and blowing out the tire on our car, I think we will be okay and I'm hoping that my interview for the LPN program went better than my sonography one and I get in this July. I always enjoy summer time so much, being outdoors talking with family, playing games going to watch the kids play baseball, grilling out, there is so much to do and not enough time, and with Tonio turning 10 this next month its getting harder to figure out that boy by the second. lol So enjoy your summer months!

Helping out a friend in need

As you all know, I was up in Ohio this past week, visiting my mom. They were absolutely shocked that I showed up. The day of the surgery arrived and I could tell she was nervous. My Dad, brother, sister, and her brother and sister all went down to the hospital with her. I wanted to go but knew that I could better server her by taking my grandmother who's 88 now, down when she wanted to go. So I helped take care of her all day. As we sat in the waiting room at Miami Valley Hospital, talking and telling stories, I wondered how the operation was going and what kind of news we would get. There were people there with clearly bad news so you kind of expect it. I mean after all people don't come to the surgery ward in the ICU area for minor stuff. When the doctor finally did come back to let us know the surgery was done he asked us to come to a debriefing room. I knew my grandma didn't want to go by the worried look on her face and my Uncle didn't either, he was way to upset I think. They were gone for a long time, and when they finally appeared none of them looked happy, so we assumed the worse, but turns out everything went okay. We spent the next 5 hours waiting in the waiting room for her to be brought to her room in the ICU and plugged in and stuff, finally we got to go back in groups of twos. It was a very long day, but the next day and the few days following we went back. Just me and my Dad went the next couple of days but I was there every step of the way. After all , she is my best friend. I was sad to leave before she got to come home but she was doing great and got to come home the next day! They told her that the tumor was not related to her breast cancer and just lucky that they found it. It was also benign(not cancerous). So her prognosis is good. I'm really hoping next trip up will be more lighthearted and I can come and visit some of you. But I wanted to let you know that the doctors said they had never seen anyone her age recover that fast from brain surgery so those prayers must have worked well. Thank you !

capturing time

As I've told some of you already, my mom , whom most of you have met, found out this past week that she has a large tumor in the back lower part of her head. They don't know weather it is cancerous yet but it is rather important that she have it removed immediately since it is pushing on her brain. Like a mother usually is she called me all calm and collected to tell me but from the moment she started talking I knew it was something she was worried about. At that point I had to make some discussions, should i travel up to OH ( a 12 hour trip) to be there with her?, I really wanted to, but we don't have any spare cash right now, since we are working so hard to pay back our debt. Everything is budgeted. I spent the evening praying and asking God for the surgery to go well. I don't want her to know how nervous I really am about her surgery, but I know the complications to this surgery could kill her. And she just recovered from her breast cancer a few years ago. And while I sit thinking of all the uncomfortable moments to come, spending time alone with my Dad, talking to my brother, seeing my sister, I know I have to do this for her, Because I know she would do it for me. I wanted to document this event now because I might not feel up to it for a while and will loose the details of the event. For those of you interested , I'll post updates on her when she has the surgery on the 13th. Please keep her in your prayers and thoughts.

Cancelling events

Our family has always had emotional issues when doing anything, so as a result we rarely do family events together. I tend to avoid them for the sake of loosing it in public, I hate having to yell or get stared at in public. So going out to eat, going bowling, camping, anything is a real effort for me. I found out that my husband planned on taking us to the gulf of Mexico in Florida for our anniversary this next coming week and It hurt me that he planned this event knowing that I am absolutely appalled by my body and to get into a bathing suit is like walking around naked to me. All the stares and whispering is enough to kill me honestly. So instead of it being a joyous and thoughtful event, it was a painful and heartbreaking one. I immediately went to work asking him to cancel it, telling him we don't have the cash for this trip, partly because we don't. and that I thought it was unfair since he kept telling me I couldn't go home because of the cash situation but we could go to Florida.... Basically I laid on the guilt.... big time.... which is something I am very good at doing to myself . I know I am the only one responsible for loosing the weight, but some times my depression gets the best of me and I cop out. So finally last night after 2 nights of quilting he caved in and said yeah we don't need to go on the trip, we can just do something here, (the sad part was , I didn't even want that, I just wanted to go about my week normally and forget it all together) " sure " I told him. Looking back , I guess I should have let it go, after all its his anniversary too, I could have suffered thru it as I usually do.

My boys have a bright future as car salesman!

Well today was the big yard sale! The boys decided on cookies as the choice of money making this year which worked out well for their stomachs lol. But they made sure to greet every person that came up to our sale with " HI would you like to buy a cookie?" then followed quickly by, " I can see your eyeing that truck over there, its only a 3$ but its in great shape." lol I was rolling with laughter inside to see my little men fast at work ... getting money for themselves. At any rate it went well, I made about 130$ Antonio made 30$, Devin 20$ and Wyatt got a 4yr olds wish 5$ for candy! I made out with a really bad sunburn on my face but over all we had fun, the boys and me past the time by playing with a talking ball the tells you who to pass it to like hot potato. So later if you need a car... come on down, I have a feeling we will be able to get you a great deal! lol

The Big Yard Sale!

Every year on post they do a post-wide yard sale and this May is it. Ive been thinking about what I want to put in and what I need to put in , and I think we have quite a bit we could sell, mostly clothes and toys but there are a few other things I am putting in. I'm just hoping for no rain . lol My problem is everytime I think I could sell something , I think man I could give this to so and so , they might need one of these. Anyone else have that problem? At any rate, I'm going to have to hold back and just sell things.

Lets hope these arent signs of things to come...

My day to take the LPN placement test had arrived, I made a special effort to get to bed early that night and eat breakfast the next morning. I got the boys off to school and dropped off Wyatt at daycare super early for him. I headed to the college and went straight to admissions to pay the 45.00$ fee for the test ( highway robbery) When i went to the testing room, the lady told me that the tests wasnt scheduled until 2pm that day! Now if its one thing thats always bothered me its people telling me one thing then forgetting it. I have an exceptional memory wich is sometimes a curse, and it really upsets me when people insist they didnt say or do something when I know they did. anyway after a few moments of telling her who I spoke with and what time I was told and all the details of my visit, she gave in and let me take the test. Which turned out to be a 2hr test. The reading and writing went smooth then came the math... some of it wasnt too bad but the fractions threw me for a loop and then came the worst , chemistry, now ive never taken chem since high school so I was guessing at this point lol. I ended up with a 74% wich I have no idea of telling weather thats good or bad , but im thinking its not great... So the next day I go to turn in the packet for the LPN program wich is due May 1st. I get there and almost wet myself, after running to the bathroom I reached for the tp and sliced my finger bad on the metal box thing, blood was everywhere... I tried my best not to get any on my packet papers, I finally made it to the room for the turn in but it was locked and no one was answering the door. ( why make something due in a room where someone isnt going to be there most of the day?) So i ended up leaving my papers with a secretary in the advisors office , least she gave me a reciept for it. Why is it everyone is so crabby there , everytime I come in to ask a question they practically give me the hand as if to say , I cant believe your asking me that.... so at this rate I just hope I havent pissed anyone off who I might need to get into this school, I will find out in late June

Never leave a panic stricken mother to explain things...

The other day, we had a severe thunderstorm warning and Tornado warning as well as a high wind advisory. At 10pm the power went out and we were all in total darkness... I kept hearing a funny buzzing noise from outside (which later turned out to be the power lines laying on the road..) Then I hear the tornado sirens go off. My 8yr old comes running in going whats that? He never goes to sleep on time.. The loud thunder and torrential down pouring rain woke up the 4yr old as all this was going on I was searching for candles for light. My husband was checking the weather on his wireless laptop and it was saying there was a tornado spotted on post where we live!! and we were to take cover immediately. We hurried to gather the kids up and rush to my closet (its the biggest and no windows or glass near by. I had to wake up Antonio as he was passed out cold. As we all huddled in the closet, 3 kids, 2 adults, 2 dogs..lol and just a candle to see by the kids were worried. I am deathly afraid of storms and tornado's myself which didn't help. They asked all sorts of stuff like .. Could we die?, Why are we in the closet?, How long do we need to stay here? If we have to leave for the school shelter what happens to our pets? I usually answer with truth since I don't like lying to my boys about anything. I told them, yes if the tornado does hit our house we might not make it. and no we couldn't take the dogs with us , they would have to stay behind. Later after power was restored the next morning I realized that I probably just instilled the same fear of storms I have in my children, but then is that really a bad thing to be afraid of something that can potentially kill you? At any rate, I'm glad the event is over and after this event I have decided to put some emergency supplies in the closet (like a flashlight) lol for next time.

run of the house...

Since today was the last day of spring break , I let the boys have one last sleep over. I knew they would be rowdy as all of them usually are but they were out of control.... within a few minutes of them arriving they managed to disassemble a toy and turn it into swords, breaking 3 of the pieces to it... then they decided to go to the neighbors and bounce on their trampoline for a while, only to come back 10 min later saying they asked them to leave for fighting... so they played video games and talked loudly all night even though I repeatedly told them to go to sleep and keep the noise down... They also decided it was time to eat at 1am apparently and proceeded to raid my cabinets and wastefully use food that was supposed to last until the 15th. Now for most homes kids eating food is fine.. but in our home its only allowed at sleep overs and only at dinner and breakfast, since we are very tight with our cash we cant allow eating frenzies to take place like this or we don't eat for a day... needless to say they used all my eggs, half a loaf of bread, and didn't clean up after themselves. I woke up to the sound of my stove being turned on and my 9 yr old cooking breakfast for his friend, yet another rule broken, no cooking unsupervised... I have since told the boys when their friends leave at noon, they will be staying in and cleaning up their messes and their bathroom. And NO more sleepovers!! I'm steaming the way my kids and their friends behaved... I don't remember ever being that bad, but maybe its because I'm a girl. at any rate, I'm not cleaning it!

The Annual Easter Egg Hunt

Well I thought for sure the big easter day hunt at the general's house would be cancelled by all the really bad weather we were having that week , but wouldn't you know , it cleared up and was a gorgeous day! The kids had a blast getting eggs and playing on the free inflatables and free candy, we discovered that Wyatt, our 4 year old is a natural at frisby throwing. and we all played frisby on the lawn for a good hour. They gave away tons of door prizes ranging from dvd players with movies to singing elmo, ipods and more. The kids are enjoying spring break this week too , having sleepovers is always the best. lol Meantime , I've been cleaning and getting my packet ready for the LPN submittion on May 1st. My parents have decided to come down this July for the 4th celebration so I'm really looking forward to it!

Please Keep Out.

I have had my motherhood moments where I've been out and about with my children and some stranger will come up and scold me for doing something to my child. This absolutly infuriates me! I consider myself an intelligent mother and more than capable of taking care of my children yet I see more and more of this behavior going on. Let me provide some examples for you thats happened to me, When my child was 18mos old I was at the store getting some items for the yard i think and he was drinking from a cup already at this point, I had a drink from BK I had gotten and he wanted to have some, so I let him have a sip, as soon as I knelt down a lady ran over and took the cup from me... she said "how could I possibly give my child that?" I took my cup back and told her to please let me be the mother and ty for your input. She kept at it until I finally had to leave the store... Case 2 I was in ToysRus buying a gift for a friends birthday party and I had my 2 boys in the cart, who were 4 and 5 when I put the toy we had finally decided on in the cart my 4 yr old decided to start jumping on it I took the liberty of telling him politely to quit, when he didnt I smacked him , soon as I did an elderly lady showed up and started yelling at me for hitting my child.. She said she was going to report me to the store manager.. To wich I replyied "you go right ahead" I could go on but your getting the picture im sure, what makes me so mad is that these ladies had no right in my opinion to butt in and take my parental rights from me.. Why cant people use some self restraint anymore and quit trying to take over ... just gets me going I guess.

I knew it couldn't last forever...

Well I found out yesterday that I didn't make the program I was hoping for, on the bright side 4 of my friends who tried out with me didnt either so we can share our pain. lol Only now we are all stuck with plan B options. Mine was to try out for the LPN program wich starts this Summer term. I have much better chances of getting into that one since they take alot more people and tryout twice a year. Its funny, when I first started thinking about going to college about 7 years ago, I wanted to become a neonatal nurse, after doing some research I found out you had to work your way thru a lot of schooling to become one, LPN to RN to MSN to Neonatal specialist nurse. In other words about 10 yrs of school. Which is sort of what I'm getting ready to embark on ..lol My husband keeps telling me that maybe God was trying to push me this way all along and he knew it was going to be a hard pill to swallow that I didnt get in so he provided some coushin for me to fall on . lol I hope so. I have faith that I will make this one count. And this gives me time to visit my Mom in Ohio for spring break with my kids and be active in their sports this summer so I cant wait. Being positive is something thats really hard for me usually but ever since Ive came to terms with my depression Ive been dealing with it better.

Getting nervous

Ive only got a week to wait now for my phonecall to see if I get accepted into the program and I'm really dreading it. There were alot of very good applicants who tried out and some of them have a bit better scores on some of the weighted classes, I think what bothers me the most is that I cant get ahead of the stuff I need to do once i get in , such as the military scholarship i need to apply for, ( have to be in the program before you can apply) books , daycare for my older boys, ect.. I am a planner I love to have things planned out months in advance, exp. Antonio's birthday is in June and Ive already planned it out lol. I know im a bit obsessive about things but I like it that way , no suprises for me. So as I wait here for the phone to ring Im contemplating what to do If I dont get in.

It's almost here!

My favorite time of the year is almost here! I love the weather just before it gets really hot here. The smell of everyone cooking out in the air, the kids playing outside in the yards laughing and giggling, all the plants in starting to bloom and come up, its just the most nostalgic moment for me, takes me back to when I was a kids running around Laura drinking from the garden hose, building castles in the sandbox with my Friends, and mom and dad would grill out . We went camping every summer pretty much that I can remember but while I'm not going to do that I can say I look back and can still remember the smells and sounds of it. Spring makes me feel refreshed and rejuvenated. ( I must hibernate in winter) I always like to come up with projects I want to do during this time and I can say I've already have a few on the list. I really want to fill up the sandbox we made for Wyatt the year we got here and didn't buy enough sand to even cover the bottom of it lol. I want to catch up on my scrapbooking that has fallen way behind since my printer went south. So let me know whats your favorite time of the year, that takes you back to being 10 years old ? Post it in comments for me I'd love to reminisce with you !

Devin gets a new cast

On friday of last week Devin and a few of his friends were wrestling in the yard and Devin landed on his hand wrong, it didnt swell so I assumed it was just a mild injury and told him to take it easy and if it still hurt in the morning i would take him in to get it x-ray. So we spent about 2hrs the next day in the ER since we didnt have an appointment and the doctor told us after looking at the x-rays that he was fine so we went home, and I took Devin back to class only to get a call 1 hour later saying to bring him back that he had a fracture and it needed to be splinted. Today we went to the specialists and they told me it was a buckle fracture which is why its so hard to see on an x-ray, it just looks like a few wavy lines in the bone. Long story short he picked out a black cast. He has to wear it till middle of April but should be fine to play baseball this year.

My Karma is kickin!

Although I dont necessarily believe in Karma, I am begining to suspect I must have finally stumbled into some luck. For those of you who are lost at this point see previous posts, I havent told many that we have been thinking of expanding our family now for some time but a few years back we went thru a very rocky past( almost ending in divorce) and we ended up having surgery to make sure we didnt have any more children. Now 4 years later we have chosen to have more children. I'm sure many of you are wondering why? and some are thinking that I'm crazy for wanting more in todays society but we do. We had been looking into the reversal surgery costs and procedures for about a year or so now and figured up that it was going to cost quite a bit of his bonus he will be getting in a few years. But when my husband told me that this procedure was now going be offered to him thru the military for free I almost wet myself! it was like hitting the lottery. Its just crazy insane luck. Of course there is a few risks to this, but its what I truly want and I so does my husband and that is what counts the most.

It's Snowing in Georgia!!!

I've lived in Georgia for only a few years and while I'm not entirely sure snow is unusual for this are, I think its safe to say that in the beginning of March its pretty warm here usually. Just as I was saying it had been in the 50's the last few days and kids and husband were complaining that the houses was too warm so I had turned off the heater thinking that winter was finally over here. I mean after all we are in the south and all.... I woke up the next morning and my husband is telling me " hey Angie, get up, it's snowing outside." I laughed and told him that was a good try but I'm not that gullible. " Alright, see for yourself then and he opened the blinds...." Ok I had to admit I was wrong and he was right ( a very rare thing in our house ) I thought well it will be gone before the evening anyway so I decided to go out to pick up a few things to work on my latest project. While I was in the store it started snowing even harder.. It kept falling all night it seems and so I had to post this in disbelief ....lol

Big plans but no time....

So... in hopes of getting into the program I've been getting my financial aid stuff in line now. I decided to look at the course schedule for the students who make it in to see when my classes would be if I make it. Turns out they are booked solid! They have us going Monday , Tuesday and Thursday from 8am to 730pm and a night class on wednesday. Which leaves me with a huge problem of daycare issues.... my daycare closes at 6pm as do most and my husbands hours are crazy and always changing so now im left to find a sitter for evenings for 3 months... what a pain. Well you would think that I have enough on my plate with college, kids and daycare issues, but nope, I apparently need more lol, I decided to do something big this year for my mom's birthday and as usual, it takes months of planning.. I want to take her to see cirque du soleil in Las Vegas. I know money will be a huge issue but I do have an aunt that works as a black jack dealer out there so im going to hit her up for some help. On top of that I've got Easter around the corner and Antonio is turning 10 this year ( huge for him) he gets to get his first military ID card! So since he wants to go to a skate rink for his birthday I have to plan in advance for that as well....lol and still find time to start my project that God has tasked me with. Man ive got a full plate.. Im hoping that all this stuff will keep me busy enough to not think about eating food and maybe I can loose some pounds at the same time. lol

How do they do it?

I am positively stumped how a kids only 3 feet tall can wreck an entire room in like 5 seconds. Last night he emptied an entire box of Q-tips out in my bedroom. It looked like it snowed in there! lol Then today while I was doing dishes I noticed it was rather quiet when I found him he had drew with red permanent marker all over his body and face. So this evening it was to no suprise that I found my bedroom yet again the site of disaster.... He had taken every crayon I had and broken them and thrown them all over my room. I thought you all would enjoy seeing this so I took a few pics of it. As you can see being a mess master is hard work. lol

Good News!

Yesterday has been a constant overload of good news. It started that morning while I was doing the dishes I put off from last night (when I say doing I mean by hand) I was doing what I always do while I wash the dishes... singing loudly and thinking about the days schedule. But little did I know I was about to get a very important message. Now you should know that although I am a christian I've never been asked to do anything in particular by God. But that morning while I was doing dishes, I suddenly was given a vision and a goal, I had no idea why but I was compelled to do this. I decided it must be very important so I am taking on the task I feel God wants me to do. And although I am wondering and hoping that its for a good reason I have to do it. So with all of that on my mind as I headed out the door for class, a friend of the family, (my husbands army Buddie) stopped by to ask me where I got my tattoo's at. I found this very ironic that he would bring this up just after I decided not to go thru with mine, and I pondered it's meaning for a bit on the drive to daycare to drop off my 4 yr old. Just as I had forgotten about the conversation and that was largely due to my child doing a Houdini in the car seat, I was asked by the 3 daycare ladies about the tattoo I have on my right chest of a hummingbird, they all expressed how much they liked it and were getting their own tattoos. I couldn't help but think to myself what is God trying to say? Is this a hint that me getting my tattoo's isn't such a bad thing after all? Then on my way to class, my husband calls to tell me that he got his extension approved! which means I can go to classes if I get in! With all the good news going I wondered when the bad was going to hit... Then the radio started playing a song about This is the Day.... I was overcome with giddy happiness and decided just to revel in the day, I'm sure the bad is just around the corner but that's another day....lol

Moving on...

well lots has been happening lately here in GA, I've been waiting patiently to hear back from my college program to see if I made the cut, we are also waiting to hear back from my husbands branch commander to see if his orders to Ft. Campbell can be deleted and give us the extension he put in for. And while all that waiting is going on other things have been put on hold like, finding a summer camp for the boys, figuring out the best way to fit in a vacation this year. Still other things have been put off permanently such as, getting my tattoo.. I know many of you were opposed to this anyway and probably see it as for the best. Out of all of these new found discoveries and waiting for a new path to start for my family, the one that I'm slowly coming to terms with is letting go of the past. I've tried diligently to keep up with people I assumed where friends of mine from the past, but I'm finding out that many of them were simply just social friends. And while it pains me to think that I might not have any true friendships, I know that there is a small chance social friends can become true friends. If any lessons come from starting down this new path it will be I have to let go of the past, and move on .

Should I stay or should I go?

Well we found out yesterday that we are moving in September back to Kentucky. If this were after I had completed my college I would be fine with it, but I'm still waiting to see if I got into the program. If I did I will have two options, either turn down my spot and leave or I can move off post with my 3 boys and rent here while my husband goes on to Kentucky and move over there in about a year. Either way isn't great in my opinion. I really want to stay and get the classes if I make it , but I also know that Medical Diagnostic Sonography is new program at the school and hasn't been accredited yet. There is a huge demand for sonographers though so coming from an accredited school might not be a huge problem to get started in the field but its at the back of my mind. I'm hoping maybe I can transfer some of my college courses to another school up there as a possibility to finish up but I have heard that a technical school's classes cant be transferred. There is always a road block. As I look at the situation its kinda funny, on one hand its super stressful to decide what to do but I cant help thinking I asked for this because I have been praying to God for him to move us out of this crappy housing for months now lol. So in a way he answered my prayers but not the way i expected him too. God has a great sense of humor. So now I'm stuck with the big decision of if I get into the school program do I take the spot and stay here with the boys on my own until December 2010 or pass it up and move to Kentucky with my husband and look for something there and put my college on hold yet again. Its a truly tough decision for me and I'm so torn.

A dying Tradition

While talking to my mother today I realized that when all my aunts and uncles have past away so will the long standing tradition of family get together. My mother being from a family of 7 always kept in touch and had monthly family reunions with her entire family, I can recall going to them ever since i was a small child. Now at 32 my mom and her sister are all that are carrying on this tradition, My grandparents have past away and get together are less and less. Realizing that once my mother and father pass away there will be no one to hold these family reunions made me a bit sad. As I told my mom that I felt the tradition would die away with her, I could almost hear the sadness in her voice. I then came up with a notion that absolutely frightens me,
Me and Chon have always wanted a large family, and we really wanted to carry on the family reunion tradition with our family, and now, against all fibers of my being, I am going to try and include my detached family. This is no small task, since my brother and I have not been on speaking terms in about 15yrs. and My sister and I only socially talk. But for my mother's sake I am going to try and carry on her family's tradition so it wont die out.

Something just for me

Its that time of year again (no not Christmas) but for me it is, its tax time! All year I go without any presents for holidays and Christmas and such ( mainly so we have money for our 3 boys) and since things are so tight these past few years with me going to school full time and not working I've felt especially bad about getting anything even when i did need it. So each year when we get the tax return back I get to get myself a gift of my choosing. For a while now I have wanted to get another tattoo, but since its a big one I've put it off time and time again .
But now more than ever I want to get this done. It has a lot of meaning behind it and I feel absolutely overjoyed at the idea that I'm finally going to do it. I am going to be getting most of my back covered with a tattoo. ( It has huge emotional and self value for me) I'm going to do it in sessions and each session runs about 4 hrs long or so , hopefully I can get the entire thing done by 6 months but we will see. As some of you know, I've spoken about this to others and prayed about it as well. Its been troubling me about the religious aspects of getting this done, and after talking to several chaplains and some friends I am going thru with it. I really want to put a scroll at the bottom with a verse from the bible that has meaning to me but I'm still working on that part. If you all have sugestions on a verse that might be about persivering thru troubled times please let me know.

On pins and needles

I have been going to college now for about a year at Columbus Technical College to apply for the Medical Diagnostic Program and I have been waiting anxiously for my letter on when my interview will be since late December now. The programs are very competetive and out of the 30 people applying for the program they are only taking 10. They determine who is going by grades, ethics values in class and an interview. Now grades might hurt me a little because while I do have all A's and B's they are mostly B's in the weighted classes. Ethics is a simple win. The interview is all thats left at this point and mine is coming up. Im nervous because alot is riding on this for me. If I dont get in I will need to go get a full time job and quit school (bye bye big money and security) at least until we move. I've heard from others who had their interview that they often ask some off the wall questions. I just hope I can come up with some great answers. At any rate I'll post more about this after the interview in a few weeks.

The easy way out

Today's school day ended with a somewhat unexpected visit from Antonio's teacher. She first explained how he has been disruptive to other students learning process and that he was very disrespectful to her today. (take into account that she knows of his situation). With all that said I thought I knew what was going to come next. I expected her to say that she was going to move his friend ( the student who he is disrupting the learning process of) to another class, this was talked about earlier but never done. Instead she suggested moving him to another class with a male teacher (something I think will help )and she wants to put him in the gifted program at school. Now maybe its just me being a mom, but I'm finding it hard to reward his poor behavior with praise. I think maybe his teacher is finally throwing in the towel with him and might be trying to make this look like a good idea. So as I pondered weather he truly deserved to be in the gifted program ( and talked with him as well) I started thinking about how lately I too have been making excuses to myself about why I cant go and jog at the track. " It's too cold outside" is a favorite since i loath the cold. After all the thoughts I came to two conclusions, one: Antonio is a very smart child and being in the gifted program might be a real challenge to him , and two: I need to get my butt out to the track and quit taking the easy way out or I'm never gonna loose this weight. lol

Boys and sleep-overs

Since its the weekend and they have monday off for MLK day, I let the two older boys have a sleep over. My oldest Antonio went to his friends and Devin brought his friend here. I'm never suprised at long they can stay awake at these, My husband and I both went to bed around 11pm and Both of the boys were still up including the 4yr old. I got up later around 1am and Devin ( the 8 yr old ) was passed out but i heard music coming from the game room so i peeked in to see who was still up. My 4yr old was playing Rock Band lol ! I wanted to get a picture of it but flash would have gave me away.

The new lady in town

Okay so just to clarify why I'm finally here for those of you who know me , I made this blog to stay in touch with those of you who don't have myspace. I've been reading but cant reply so hence the pages here. So just a quick catch up for those of you who don't know, we just got back from Mexico (yes, we drove) and it was a great experience. I've seen things there that I absolutely loved and that broke my heart. We stayed with my husbands family in Villa Corona for 10 days and visited the beach in Manzanillo for 3. I tried every food that was asked of me and most of it wasn't bad. We ended up getting a stomach virus while there (no we didn't drink the water) Lucky for us his Aunt is a nurse there and she got us medicine . Looking back on the trip and knowing that they next time we visit his grandparents will probably have passed away (they are in their 90's) it was a sad yet happy occasion. I took lots of pictures and Ive posted some on myspace for those of you that visit there.